Lessons from Christen

This Christmas season has been special because Chris has come of age to understand, appreciate, and participate in the activities we've done.

We started out making a sock advent calendar to count down to Christmas, and she helped to clip the little socks on the ribbon and to stick the numbers on the socks. She was so excited to see what was in the sock for the day, and I was amazed she knew exactly which day it was. I put treats, verses, time tickets with Mommy and Daddy in the socks.

We've also baked cookies for friends and people around us.

But most of all, it's been special because of the lessons she's taught me. When we were in the car going to a friend's house to have a Christmas celebration, she said, " I don't want to get any more presents. I have enough presents already." At that point in time, she only had one present under the tree. I thought she was just kidding. When our friends gave her a present, she said, " I don't want any more presents." I was thinking, " Well, Mommy would like more presents!" My little one taught me what contentment was.

On Christmas day, we opened presents, and Christen received this Princess stationery set. I knew she had friends who really liked them, and would appreciate it more than her. So I asked if she was willing to give it away to them. She said, " I really like it too, but I'll give it to my friend."

I was so proud of my gal! I was also humbled by her willingness to give, and it reminded me of how God was willing to give His one and only Son to redeem our sins. I have a big lesson to learn about giving.

My favourite painting done by Chris

Christmas 2008

C. acting as the shepherdess carrying baby Jesus in her sling

Baking sugar cookies for gifts - L. having a ball with flour!

Carolling at the hospital - was amazed that the kids were not afraid when they saw sickly and elderly patients; the kids went up to the patients and were very tender towards them

Reflections...

We were in the car yesterday and dh and I were talking about some people we knew who were going away on vacation without their kids. I said I was really angry, and Chris turned to me and asked me why. This was how the conversation went:

Chris: Why are you so angry, Mommy?

Me: Because some people don't spend time with their children and read to them, and play with them. ( Pause). Does Mommy do that?

Chris: No! You do nice things to me everyday, and spend time with me, and read to me, and play with me, and love me.

Needless to say, I was over the moon. My daughter actually understands that this is how I'm loving her.

Not that I'm against couples going away to build on their marriages or to take breaks. But I realize I'm really passionate for children, and get really worked up when I see that parents are not spending enough time with their children . My daughters have taught me time and again that all they want and need are for Daddy and Mommy to play with them and just BE with them.
For example, we were planning to go on a mission trip to Thailand. We prepped the girls, prayed with them every night, talked about going on a airplane, and at least Chris was really excited. But when the airport was closed, and we explained to Chris that we weren't going anymore, she wasn't disappointed. She was just so happy that Daddy was home for 6 whole days, and that we hung out and did things as a family.

Covenant EFC Vacation Bible School

We did VBS for the first time in my church, and I offered to help, not knowing what I was getting in to. It took a few months of planning and preparation, days of setting up, and days after the camp to recover from the sheer exhaustion. We set up the room to look like a Mayan jungle. Other rooms were decorated to look like a Native American village, Hawaii, Medieval Castle, Ancient China. It was amazing to see the creativity and effort of all the teachers. We were supposed to teach the ten commandments.

It was a blast running it, and although it was challenging at times to have my little 'caterpillars' with me ( I was Ms Butterfly) throughout the camp, the great thing was that the gals came back singing the camp songs. One of the songs was ' Obey, obey your parents'. The night they came back from the camp, they were talking to each other while lying on their beds. One would pretend to whine, and the other would say, " Obey!"

Hand Flowers

We made these hand flowers - cutouts of the kids' handprints, rolled them up and attached a straw to each flower. Then we put them in a vase ( a cut plastic water bottle) to give to a friend who gave birth to twins and had complications and so couldn't have fresh flowers in her ward.

Thought it looked really nice and it was really easy to make. Got this idea from http://www.oureverydaythings.com

My Birthday Celebration

I'm the kind of person who thinks, " Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I'm gonna eat some worms". So the day before my birthday, I was throwing a little pity party for myself, thinking noone will remember my birthday. But thanks to Facebook, I received many well-wishes from friends from all over the world. That made me happy. :) Then, came my birthday, and I received smses from friends wishing me a Happy Birthday again.

My dh took the kids and I to the nice pizza restaurant at the Botanical Gardens, but we were turned away because he didn't make a reservation! I was disappointed, thinking I wasn't even going to get a slice of cake on the house on my birthday. We were starving by then, so I asked if we could take-away, and the waiter said yes. We got out our picnic mat, and it turned out to be a great birthday dinner under the stars!

The Smartest Giants in Town

We read The Smartest Giant in Town by Julia Donaldson, and had a dress-up activity where Chris and Laura got to put on Daddy's clothes. :) It was hilarious! NB: The blue 'pants' that L's wearing are dh's boxers.

Polliwalks shoes

Check these shoes out! My neighbour, author of http://www.oureverydaythings.com, was at the playground holding her kids' shoes, and I just did a double - take to look at the cutest shoes. I learned that they are called Polliwalks shoes. I came home and showed Chris the shoes on the internet, and she had this smile and longing on her face that made me hope Santa Claus would make a mental note and give her a pair for Christmas.

There are different animal styles and really great colours, and the soles of the shoes actually make the footprints of those animals. You can see them at http://www.polliwalks.com. I wish they came in adult sizes too... drool...

Some musings

Alvin said it again after a lunch conversation with his colleague. His colleague has many hobbies like Lego building and he's into steam engines now. Because of his interests and pursuit of knowledge on the things he's interested in, his 3 yr old daughter is also interested in those things, and he imparts his knowledge to her. Alvin reiterated the point that we cannot teach our children what we are not. So it always begins with us. If we are always growing and learning, and if we are truly passionate about life, our children will likely be like that. Which is why I'm drawn to homeschooling, because I am constantly challenged to learn and to grow with my children.

How much does a 3 1/2 yr old really understand?

We attended Timor Nite tonight, a meeting to share about the vision God has given to churches in Singapore to transform this baby nation. It's historical as it's the first time churches, not missions agencies, of different denominations have formed an alliance to reach a nation and be involved in many aspects of the nation building.

We were given a card with the map of Timor on it, and some prayer pointers. While different people were going up to share, I whipped out the coloring pencils and and coloring book for Christen and a snack for Lauren to occupy them.

When it was time to pray for Timor, I gathered the kids and told Christen to pray for the children of Timor, that they would be healthy and strong and not get sick. So Christen prayed, " Dear God, please help the children to be strong and healthy. Help them to have clean water to drink so that they won't get sick." The clean water bit was mentioned by a doctor when he was sharing how the people in Timor didn't really need doctors. The children often suffered from diarrhea because of malnutrition and dirty water. The children and their parents really needed someone to tell them about hygiene and good nutrition.

Was Christen listening while she was coloring?
Did she understand it? Did she 'get' it?

Her prayer said it all.

Dog Phobia

Lauren's been saying this every time we see a dog, "

Foo-foo bite ME!"

Think she's trying to say Woof - woof. Am documenting this because this is good enough reason for Alvin to want a 3rd kid. :) Yes, we think she's beyond the cute limit.

Growing pains for Mommy

I was emotional after a conversation with Christen the other day during lunch. We were just chatting and talking about babies. Then she said, " Lauren is your baby." To which I replied, " And you are my baby too." She retorted, " No, I'm not your baby. I'm growing up! I need to grow up and have my own baby!"

It is painful to think of her growing up and leaving us someday. I really wish I could stop the clock and stop her from growing. I don't want her to grow up. I want her to be my little baby forever. That's when I'm reminded that she doesn't belong to me, but she belongs to God, and He has graciously allowed me to parent her and bring her up to fulfill His purposes for her life.

The Gift of Salvation

August 27, 2008.

This day would have been just another day, maybe even a grouchy one because the kids have leaky noses and it's been rainy, and these 2 combinations make a depressed mom.

But this day turned out to be the climax of my parenting so far. After putting Lauren to sleep, Christen and I read People, by Peter Spier - a really well- written and illustrated book that describes all kinds and types of people in the world, and helps children to appreciate the diversity of cultures, skin colors, and religions of people.

So we were looking at the page on different religions and myriads of gods that people worship, and Christen said, " We must only worship the one true God! We cannot worship other idols!" We had sung the 10 commandments and so she said that.

Something in me just told me to take out the evangecube and share the gospel with her and to ask her if she would like Jesus to come into her heart and life. As we went through the evangecube, she understood it because we've talked about it in devotions. Finally, when I asked her if she wanted to pray and ask Jesus into her heart, she said yes! I told her it's very serious, and asked her if she knew she had sin. She said she knew she did have sin and wanted Jesus into her heart. We knelt down by our red couch and prayed the sinner's prayer, right there in our living room!!! Yippeeee!!!! I had the privilege of bringing my daughter before the throne of God!

We celebrated her decision with dinner at Ikea and a chocolate mousse. :)

It was so heartwarming when Christen told her Daddy about what had happened, and she said, " It's very serious."

As I reflect on what happened, I'm again reminded about how Jesus said that the kingdom of God belongs to the little children. They don't ask tons of questions, they're not skeptical, they're not jaded, they just believe. It was almost anti-climatic. I didn't have to persuade her to believe it, she just did because of the seeds that have been planted.

What is Heaven like?

At that time Jesus said, "I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. - Matthew 11:25

And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. - Matthew 18:3

We started reading The Lamb, by John Cross for family devotions at night. It's the children's version of Strangers on the Road to Emmaus, by John Cross, and it goes through the Bible chronologically. The gospel really made sense to me when I read the book and studied the Bible in this way. It's costly ( $42 at SKS), but so worth the investment.

We read about what Heaven is like tonight. When Alvin asked the girls what Heaven is like, Lauren said, " Fine", practising her newly learned vocabulary word. She said it with so much effort and sincerity we tried really hard not to burst out laughing. Of course she was right, Heaven is fine - in every sense of the word.

Christen said, " Flowers." I began to imagine Heaven just filled with flowers of all colours and sizes and fragrance, and began to really 'see' how beautiful Heaven was going to be.

I thought those answers were precious because they were perspectives from children, and not trite answers that we know in our heads but not in our hearts and souls.

Those verses are so, so true.

Best of Friends

The love that my girls have for each other is just so special to watch as it unfolds. Lauren has had her Jie Jie with her since Day 1, I don't know what she would do without her. She worships the ground her sister walks on, and imitates her sister's every antic and movement. We buy a new spoon for her, and Christen wants it. Lauren hands it over to her willingly.

Christen adores her little meimei. She fusses over her, asks us to hug her when she cries, and tells us not to scold her. The other day, Christen was playing with a toy dog and pretended to bite Lauren. Lauren was scared and burst into tears. Immediately, Christen dropped the dog, and hugged her sister until she calmed down.

There was another time I couldn't pacify Lauren and I had to cook lunch for the kids. Christen took it upon herself to take care of her sister. Lauren stopped whining and played very happily with her sister. I was so thankful for Christen!

I pray they'll really grow up to be best friends.

What's it for?

Christen played with our neighbour's kid today. She's an Indian girl who lives right next door to us. She came over to our house and saw a milk bottle with colourful beads in it. So she asked Christen what it was for. Chris answered, " It's for praising the Lord."

It's our home-made maraccas, and we put it in a music box containing different instruments. When we have music and movement time after devotions everyday, we'll pull out the box and say, " It's time to worship God!" Guess that's how Christen associates it with praising the Lord.

When I told Alvin about it, he laughed and said, " I guess she's not going to fit in, is she?"

I guess not, but I guess it's more important to prepare my children for heaven rather than Harvard. I'm also beginning to understand how a Christian and biblical worldview can be developed in a child, step by step, word by word.

Istana - National Day Open House

We had such a fun time at the Istana on Sunday. It was such a hot afternoon, and we were wilting from the heat, but my longing for the carpet grass gave us the drive to walk the loooooong way in to where the fountain and carpet grass was, with big bags and 2 kids in tow, and with NO stroller.

When we finally got to the fountain and grass, I just about collapsed to the ground. The gals were drawn to the fountain like bees to honey, and were splashing around till they got all wet. Then Chris decided to jump in and have a real dip, and practise her swimming skills. This is her blowing bubbles in the fountain.

Thank you, Mr President, for opening up the Istana for us commoners! It was a real treat to swim in the royal fountain!

Eric Liddell - an Olympic Hero

On Friday, our playgroup's theme was on the Olympics. The kids learned about the origin of the Olympics, the motto, the significance of the rings and their colors and heard a story about Eric Liddell.

I've read about Eric Liddell and saw the Chariots of Fire, but researching and telling the kids about him have inspired me so greatly. He was an Olympic champion in 1924, and subsequently became a missionary to China. He was famous for his signature running posture, which was to throw his head back as if he's looking at heaven. He was also famous, or infamous for turning down his pet event, the 100m dash, at the Olympics because it was to be held on a Sunday. For Eric, it was a day of rest and worship. Today, that would have been easily rationalized away and Christians and non-Christians alike would say that it was a matter of the heart, and he could have run and treated another day his Sabbath and he could worship God anytime, not just on Sunday.

Eric stood his ground, much to the displeasure of the whole of Britain, but went on to win in the 400m event, breaking the world record as well. His life was completely poured out for Christ, serving as a missionary and at the concentration camp during WWII. He died at the camp just before WWII ended, away from his family.

As I read about him, and people's testimonials of him, the thought that kept coming to me was that this was a life that brought God so much glory and pleasure. He reflected Christ so well, and God must have been so proud of him.

On another note, I was shocked when Christen retold the story today - the story I told the kids last Friday in the open air where my voice was lost to the wind, and the kids were just loosely gathered on a mat. In her words, she said, " Eric Lidell persevered. He didn't want to run on Sunday because he said, " my God is the most important to me so I must go to church and Sunday school. But the people were angry with him but he still didn't run.

WOW! What truth can be deposited in the hearts of children if we just take time to do that.

Here's the link to a short clip of Chariots of Fire: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPB7r0UpNIE

Don't Live for the Dot

We've just come back from a 2 day seminar titled "Integrating Family and Church Life". I've never felt more educated and challenged in my 25 years of education.

These are some key learning and transformational points for me:

1) Don't live for the dot - the dot signifies this life on planet earth in reference to the vast universe God has created and to eternity. Ecclesiastes 3:11 says, "He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end." Don't spend time and effort trying to fill in the dot, that's just too insignificant. We are made in the image of God, so we're image-bearers of what God looks like. That means we're meant for greatness and to live 'epic lives', as Moses Tey, the speaker described it. We should live, and spend time and effort building for eternity.

2) At what age is one considered an adult? Is it at the legal age of 18 or 21? The answer to the question changes one's entire perspective on the teenage years, which are often known as the turbulent times. Before the industrial revolution and before formal school was introduced ( about 150 years ago), there was no such thing as teenage rebellion. At 12 years old, children were considered, and treated as adults. They possessed the maturity and wisdom needed to run a household and hold important responsibilities. In the Bible, Jesus was in the temple discussing theology with the rabbis at 12 yrs old. Daniel and his friends, Joseph, were about 13-14 years old when they were captured and taken into exile and sold into slavery. Yet, at this age, they were able to stand up for their faith and provide leadership that changed the course of history and save their nations.

This was really enlightening for me. I've gone through 'teenage rebellion' myself, and I've been very intimidated by teenagers nowadays. They dress and look much more 'grown up', get into relationships and have pre-marital sex once they reach adolescence. Yet, they are so childish in their ways and thinking, and for that matter, even adults can be so childish and immature. And that is because they are supposed to be adults, but are not trained in the educational system and by their families to be mature. This begs the question, " What is maturity?" Is it the ability to hold down a job, raise a family, be a decent person? My dear husband just answered this brilliantly. To him, maturity is bearing the image of Christ so well and clearly; it is truly living the life that shows and says, " it is no longer I who lives, but Christ who lives in me."

I don't have to expect teenage rebellion from my children. I can expect them to do great things for God in their youth instead.

3) 'Imitate me as I imitate Christ' - Paul said this, and it embodies what discipling means. I am discipling my children as they imitate me as I imitate Christ. To me, that means I have not, and will not be perfect in my parenting, but as I walk and journey with Christ, my children will see that it is a living relationship and we will grow together in our journey to know Him and make Him known.

Siblings sleeping together

As I'm writing, my kids are still singing and laughing and talking. And they've been doing that for the past hour. AND it's past midnight.

It's not great that they're still up so late, but it's such precious bonding time between them I'm reluctant to end it. Christen was singing to Lauren. Then she taught her some new vocabulary words.

Here's one of the conversations that transpired ( i can hear them from my room):
Christen: Say 'eskimo', Lauren.
Lauren: Keepmo.
Christen (bursts out in laughter): No, 'eskimo'.
Lauren: Keepmo. Mummy.
Christen: Mommy is a keepmo!

Both of them burst out in laughter.

Think I need to go make them sleep now...

Ballet Under the Stars

We were blessed with tickets to Ballet Under the Stars, and got to enjoy a stellar performance for free! The weather was perfect, and we had an awesome spot right in the front of the stage. Two pretty ladies behind us supplied the kids with cherries, and Christen went to the stage to sing Happy Birthday to Singapore Dance Theatre and got a nice red T-shirt which she calls her nightgown. :) Lauren was engaged throughout the whole performance and loved to watch the ballerinas.

On the way home, Christen said, " Thank you for taking me to Ballet Under the Stars. I really liked it."

A wonderful family night of music and dance under the stars. Am still savouring the memory.

Don't let your child be a Kangaroo

Just watched this really great video clip about what success really means for your child, and discovering and helping children develop their greatest potentials.

Go to this link to watch it: http://www.raisingsmallsouls.com/

Teachable Moments

I never really know when those teachable moments are when they happen, I just always pray that my children are learning all the time. There were a few teachable moments today. Actually, i wouldn't really call them teachable moments, because I didn't 'teach' Christen at those moments, I just had the privilege of talking with her and hearing from her what she has been learning.

For devotions today, we read the story about the poor widow's gift. I gave Chris a purse with 2 coins, and Lauren another coin purse with many coins. After the story, we acted it out, and she got to decide how many coins she wanted to put in the offering box. She said, " I will give God all my coins. I won't save it for my kiddy ride." I was so proud of her response.

At lunch, we were listening to tape recording of The Creation and Satan tempting Adam and Eve in Chinese. She said, " I know who Satan is. He is no good, and very naughty. Lauren is a bit naughty. But I'm a good girl." I replied, " You're right! But sometimes we are naughty too. When Lauren bites you, she's naughty. When you snatch her toy, you're naughty. And mommy is naughty too." She laughed and said, " That's why we need God. And He shows us grace." That was another 'wow' moment for me. She has assimilated our previous discussions about God and grace.

My prayer for my children is that they will know that they are sinners in need of God's grace and receive His gift of grace and salvation.

God made me this way

When Alvin told Christen that she was very creative, Christen replied, " God made me this way."
I pray that she will truly understand and know that God is her Creator, and she will worship Him and obey Him.

Family Traditions

I've always read about the importance of having family traditions so that children will grow up with a strong sense of belonging and identity, as well as precious memories that they will carry with them throughout life. I've read about things people do and have tried to replicate them, but nothing beats creating the Chee's very own family traditions.

Christen has started the few rituals that we do every night. One night, after Daddy read the Bible, Christen said, " Let's hold hands to pray." We did it that night, and have been doing it after Bible story time every night. She started another one tonight. After we prayed tonight, she said, " Let's stand up and hug." So we all took turns to hug one another and to say we love one another. Christen specifically told Mommy and Daddy to hug too. After we've done our rounds, she said, " Let's do it the 2nd time." So we hugged and kissed again. We all felt so loved, it was so wonderful!God really reveals His love in tangible ways.

Funny Quotes

Dad: (trying to scrape the whole chicken off the grill) The chicken doesn't move.
Christen: That's because it's not a person like us.

Mom: ( in exasperation) How many times do you want me to clean up spills in a day?
Christen: Only 1 time.

Christen: I pee-ed and pooped! 2 pieces. They were round circles.

Christen( at Henderson waves where one can hang on the side of the undulating bridge): Look! A monkey!
Dad: Where?
Christen: Here!
Dad( looking around and not seeing any monkeys): Are you the monkey?
Christen: Yes!!

I love you very, very much

It's truly the little things in life - the words said, the hugs, the smiles, the small deeds, that mean so much. Christen wanted to write after seeing me write the memory verse on the blackboard. So she went to her whiteboard and said, " I want to write ' I love Daddy, I love Lauren, I love God, I love Mommy." She proceeded to draw a picture of Daddy, and wrote I love Daddy with help with spelling from me. Then she stared at me intently, and said, " Your face is an oval."She drew a few shapes, but wasn't satisfied. She asked me to help her draw it finally. Then she said, " I love myself too, so I'll draw myself. I draw myself next to you because I love you very, very much."

She said it in a matter-of-fact way, but I was floating up to the clouds. :) That was the highlight of my otherwise disastrous day.

Christen's Prayer

Quote from Christen's prayer tonight:

Dear God,
Please heal Lauren. She is very, very sick. Only Jesus can heal her. She cannot heal herself. If Jesus does not heal her, she will not get well! In Jesus' name, Amen